1
00:00:05,273 --> 00:00:06,804
Hey, Dave.
What's going on?
2
00:00:06,889 --> 00:00:09,110
Oh, hey, Calvin. Just picking up
my new lawn signs
3
00:00:09,195 --> 00:00:10,398
for the campaign.
4
00:00:10,491 --> 00:00:12,797
What do you think?
5
00:00:14,046 --> 00:00:16,157
I think you're gonna look great
with a blacked out tooth
6
00:00:16,241 --> 00:00:18,617
and the word "dork"
across your forehead.
7
00:00:20,245 --> 00:00:22,685
Yeah, I didn't think about
the kids vandalizing my signs.
8
00:00:23,060 --> 00:00:25,124
Who said anything about kids?
9
00:00:26,453 --> 00:00:27,969
So you're really gonna
go through with this?
10
00:00:28,053 --> 00:00:31,204
Hell, yeah. Look, we need
stronger schools, safer parks,
11
00:00:31,289 --> 00:00:32,766
and when it comes
to our city government,
12
00:00:32,850 --> 00:00:34,281
we need to have
an open dialogue.
13
00:00:34,366 --> 00:00:35,396
Well, great.
14
00:00:35,484 --> 00:00:37,828
You open that one,
and I'll close this one.
15
00:00:38,156 --> 00:00:39,648
I'm serious, Calvin.
16
00:00:39,772 --> 00:00:41,226
We need strong
representation,
17
00:00:41,311 --> 00:00:43,490
and we haven't been getting
it from Isaiah Evans.
18
00:00:43,703 --> 00:00:47,446
Look, Isaiah has beenour
councilman for a long time.
19
00:00:47,531 --> 00:00:48,688
People love him.
20
00:00:48,773 --> 00:00:50,320
He led the march
on Washington.
21
00:00:50,460 --> 00:00:52,343
You mean with
Martin Luther King?
22
00:00:52,507 --> 00:00:56,132
No. The marchon
Washington Boulevard.
23
00:00:56,803 --> 00:01:00,531
We wanted that Chipotle,
and he got it for us.
24
00:01:00,804 --> 00:01:02,594
Okay, but that was
a long time ago,
25
00:01:02,679 --> 00:01:04,248
and he hasn't done
anything since.
26
00:01:04,332 --> 00:01:06,772
Calvin, don't you want someone
who's gonna roll up his sleeves
27
00:01:06,856 --> 00:01:08,470
and make an impact
on this community?
28
00:01:08,554 --> 00:01:11,688
Nope. I don't like
governmenttelling me what to do.
29
00:01:11,773 --> 00:01:13,617
I got Tina for that.
30
00:01:14,752 --> 00:01:17,133
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
31
00:01:17,218 --> 00:01:19,007
♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪
*THE NEIGHBORHOOD*
32
00:01:21,121 --> 00:01:23,312
Season 02 Episode 22
Title: "Welcome to the Campaign"
33
00:01:23,404 --> 00:01:24,781
Aired on:
May 04, 2020
34
00:01:26,180 --> 00:01:27,757
Hi, this is Dave Johnson.
35
00:01:27,842 --> 00:01:29,020
I'm running for city council,
36
00:01:29,105 --> 00:01:30,846
and I'm calling
to ask for your support.
37
00:01:31,752 --> 00:01:34,363
Yeah, I'm the white guy.
38
00:01:35,889 --> 00:01:37,476
Well, yes,
Dave is the one
39
00:01:37,561 --> 00:01:39,742
who got the speed bump
put in on Evergreen.
40
00:01:41,647 --> 00:01:43,913
Oh, you hit it too hard
and messed up your alignment?
41
00:01:45,609 --> 00:01:47,281
Well, take it on down
to Calvin's Pit Stop
42
00:01:47,366 --> 00:01:49,093
and vote for Dave Johnson.
43
00:01:57,335 --> 00:01:59,382
Grover, you are
licking too slow.
44
00:01:59,504 --> 00:02:02,429
You are dabbing
when you should be sliding.
45
00:02:02,533 --> 00:02:04,013
Here, let me show you.
46
00:02:04,392 --> 00:02:07,526
Ah... Aah! Paper cut!
47
00:02:08,785 --> 00:02:12,539
Now you're bleeding
when you should be dabbing.
48
00:02:15,046 --> 00:02:17,834
So, I was thinking of invitingthe
women from the neighborhood
49
00:02:17,919 --> 00:02:20,031
for an elegant
ladies' afternoon.
50
00:02:20,116 --> 00:02:22,248
You know,
put out the good china,
51
00:02:22,333 --> 00:02:24,773
serve some tea and scones.
52
00:02:25,021 --> 00:02:27,320
Tea and scones? Is Dave
going to be a councilman
53
00:02:27,405 --> 00:02:28,765
or a Disney princess?
54
00:02:31,304 --> 00:02:32,743
I'm just trying to help him.
55
00:02:32,898 --> 00:02:34,529
Most of the neighborhood
just knows him
56
00:02:34,614 --> 00:02:37,703
as the jogger in short shorts
who's terrified of squirrels.
57
00:02:40,228 --> 00:02:41,319
Hey, hey.
58
00:02:41,426 --> 00:02:43,038
Ooh, well, well, well.
59
00:02:43,123 --> 00:02:45,000
Look who showed up to volunteer.
60
00:02:45,251 --> 00:02:49,255
So, Calvin, you finally ready
to ride the Dave wave?
61
00:02:50,713 --> 00:02:51,939
No.
62
00:02:52,033 --> 00:02:53,851
Tina told me
there was a deli tray.
63
00:02:53,936 --> 00:02:55,078
Forget the Dave wave.
64
00:02:55,163 --> 00:02:57,554
I'm ready
to jump on the ham tram.
65
00:02:59,774 --> 00:03:01,657
You know, I don't get it.
Why won't you support me?
66
00:03:01,741 --> 00:03:03,443
I supported youwhen
Old Miss Kim accused you
67
00:03:03,527 --> 00:03:04,945
of stealingher garden gnome.
68
00:03:05,091 --> 00:03:06,835
That's because I didn't do it.
69
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,710
I was just the lookout.
70
00:03:10,153 --> 00:03:12,140
I'm serious, Calvin.
71
00:03:12,413 --> 00:03:14,570
You know, people around here
really look up to you,
72
00:03:14,754 --> 00:03:17,117
and your endorsement
could help my campaign.
73
00:03:17,287 --> 00:03:20,423
And I'd give it to you, Dave,
except for one small problem.
74
00:03:20,851 --> 00:03:22,187
This deli tray has
75
00:03:22,272 --> 00:03:24,484
a better chance of winning
than you do.
76
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:28,140
Ooh, spicy mustard.
77
00:03:29,361 --> 00:03:31,664
I wouldn't underestimate
my husband.
78
00:03:31,749 --> 00:03:33,750
Back in Kalamazoo,
he got them to shut down
79
00:03:33,835 --> 00:03:35,274
the strip club
next to the school.
80
00:03:35,359 --> 00:03:36,668
Oh, good for him.
81
00:03:36,753 --> 00:03:38,375
Yeah, I was so proud.
82
00:03:38,546 --> 00:03:41,114
Even though it put
half my cousins out of work.
83
00:03:43,798 --> 00:03:45,106
This isn't Kalamazoo.
84
00:03:45,308 --> 00:03:47,009
This neighborhood
is 80% black,
85
00:03:47,094 --> 00:03:49,921
and Dave is 100% white.
86
00:03:50,637 --> 00:03:53,640
110% when he wears
his Crocs.
87
00:03:54,049 --> 00:03:56,242
You know,
so what if I'm white?
88
00:03:56,327 --> 00:03:58,114
This community will vote
for the best person
89
00:03:58,199 --> 00:03:59,638
for the job.
That's what I believe.
90
00:03:59,723 --> 00:04:02,835
And I believe I'm gonna
take my sandwich to go.
91
00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:04,828
All aboard
the ham tram!
92
00:04:04,913 --> 00:04:06,914
Toot, toot!
93
00:04:12,094 --> 00:04:14,850
Well, I hope
you're happy.
94
00:04:14,935 --> 00:04:17,929
Oh, I am. You know,
I had my doubts at first,
95
00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:20,659
but spicy mustard
was the way to go.
96
00:04:22,337 --> 00:04:23,968
I'm talking about Dave.
97
00:04:24,053 --> 00:04:25,884
We're all over there
supporting him.
98
00:04:25,969 --> 00:04:28,540
- Why won't you?
- Because
99
00:04:28,625 --> 00:04:30,021
I don't want him
to look like
100
00:04:30,135 --> 00:04:32,070
the white guy
who thinks he knows better,
101
00:04:32,155 --> 00:04:35,335
swooping in to fix
all the black folks' problems.
102
00:04:35,450 --> 00:04:36,976
If I wanted a white savior,
103
00:04:37,067 --> 00:04:39,960
I'd watch Sandra Bullock
in The Blind Side.
104
00:04:43,214 --> 00:04:44,828
Calvin, you love that movie.
105
00:04:45,049 --> 00:04:46,444
I don't love that movie.
106
00:04:46,529 --> 00:04:48,460
I just said,
"Don't change the channel."
107
00:04:50,061 --> 00:04:51,781
Okay, you're right.
108
00:04:51,866 --> 00:04:53,976
Some people may think
Dave is that way.
109
00:04:54,061 --> 00:04:56,437
But that's not who he is,
and you know that.
110
00:04:56,522 --> 00:04:59,945
That's because
I'm an evolved man, Tina.
111
00:05:00,698 --> 00:05:02,662
You can't expect
the rest of the neighborhood
112
00:05:02,747 --> 00:05:05,140
to be as open-minded as me.
113
00:05:06,789 --> 00:05:08,539
Open-minded?
Seriously?
114
00:05:08,624 --> 00:05:10,063
You refuse to
watch a movie
115
00:05:10,148 --> 00:05:11,921
if it has subtitles.
116
00:05:12,006 --> 00:05:15,125
If I wanted to read,
I'd get an audiobook.
117
00:05:17,572 --> 00:05:21,234
All I know is Dave cares
about this community.
118
00:05:21,540 --> 00:05:22,539
Councilman Evans
119
00:05:22,624 --> 00:05:24,367
has been coasting
or years.
120
00:05:24,452 --> 00:05:25,632
All he ever does is brag
121
00:05:25,717 --> 00:05:27,418
about the time
he met Eddie Murphy.
122
00:05:28,445 --> 00:05:29,562
Tina, but you got to admit,
123
00:05:29,647 --> 00:05:31,608
that's a great story
right there.
124
00:05:32,004 --> 00:05:35,281
I mean, the same car wash
on the same day?
125
00:05:35,445 --> 00:05:37,445
That's destiny.
126
00:05:38,410 --> 00:05:41,437
Okay, fine. Do what you want,
but I'm supporting our friend.
127
00:05:41,522 --> 00:05:44,137
So am I.
I'm protecting him.
128
00:05:44,330 --> 00:05:47,210
I don't want to see anybody
attack or ridicule him.
129
00:05:47,295 --> 00:05:49,735
You ridicule him
all the time.
130
00:05:49,820 --> 00:05:51,912
But I do it
from a place of love.
131
00:05:52,463 --> 00:05:53,625
What?
132
00:05:53,717 --> 00:05:55,359
I love doing it.
133
00:05:59,288 --> 00:06:00,609
Calvin, I can't tell you
134
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,438
how much it means to
have your endorsement.
135
00:06:02,523 --> 00:06:04,311
Oh, I'm not
endorsing you.
136
00:06:04,406 --> 00:06:06,541
I just brought you
to the barbershop to show you
137
00:06:06,626 --> 00:06:08,675
what the people around
herethink about you running.
138
00:06:08,775 --> 00:06:10,606
Plus, I can't wait
139
00:06:10,691 --> 00:06:14,086
till the fellas hear howyou
shut down the strip club.
140
00:06:16,208 --> 00:06:18,484
Well, you'll see. I'm gonna
get plenty of support.
141
00:06:18,569 --> 00:06:21,625
After all, you know, I'm
down with Que and the guys.
142
00:06:21,710 --> 00:06:23,019
I just brought a
squash casserole
143
00:06:23,104 --> 00:06:24,835
over to the shop last week.
144
00:06:25,156 --> 00:06:26,179
Dave,
145
00:06:26,264 --> 00:06:29,923
there's nothing downabout
a squash casserole.
146
00:06:30,528 --> 00:06:34,039
There will be once they get
their cholesterol checked.
147
00:06:37,556 --> 00:06:38,826
Hey, shop.
148
00:06:38,911 --> 00:06:40,093
- What's up, man?
- Hey, Calvin.
149
00:06:40,177 --> 00:06:41,435
- Hey, Calvin.
- Hey, Dave.
150
00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:43,438
- What's up, Dave?
- Yo, Dave.
151
00:06:43,707 --> 00:06:46,974
Did you get that thank you
notel sent you for the casserole?
152
00:06:48,240 --> 00:06:49,549
You hear that, Calvin?
153
00:06:49,825 --> 00:06:51,606
He loved it.
154
00:06:52,426 --> 00:06:54,710
And the serving dish it
came in was great, too.
155
00:06:54,795 --> 00:06:56,666
I sold it for ten bucks.
156
00:06:58,164 --> 00:06:59,387
Cool. Cool.
157
00:06:59,472 --> 00:07:00,825
Got that in Peru.
158
00:07:00,988 --> 00:07:03,496
Uh,
so, you guys might've heard
159
00:07:03,581 --> 00:07:05,021
that I'm running
for city council.
160
00:07:05,260 --> 00:07:06,970
Yeah, we heard.
161
00:07:08,839 --> 00:07:11,496
I saw one of your signs.
I thought it was hilarious.
162
00:07:11,581 --> 00:07:13,282
They drew eye patch, horns,
163
00:07:13,367 --> 00:07:14,772
and I don't want to saywhat
you had in your mouth.
164
00:07:19,708 --> 00:07:20,740
Why are you
looking at me?
165
00:07:20,863 --> 00:07:23,258
I just did the eye patch
and the horns.
166
00:07:25,138 --> 00:07:26,094
O-Okay.
167
00:07:26,179 --> 00:07:27,558
I-I'm starting to get the vibe
168
00:07:27,642 --> 00:07:29,628
that, uh, some of you
might be skeptical.
169
00:07:29,757 --> 00:07:31,202
But, you know, I've got
some really great ideas
170
00:07:31,286 --> 00:07:33,261
about the neighborhood that I
think might change your minds.
171
00:07:33,345 --> 00:07:34,495
Uh, I got a question.
172
00:07:34,882 --> 00:07:36,815
Great. Fire away.
173
00:07:36,900 --> 00:07:39,471
Was that an Old Bay seasoning
you used in that casserole,
174
00:07:39,556 --> 00:07:41,135
or was it Lawry's?
175
00:07:43,339 --> 00:07:44,854
Any other questions?
176
00:07:44,939 --> 00:07:45,677
Oh, yeah.
177
00:07:45,761 --> 00:07:47,201
That are not
about the casserole.
178
00:07:47,285 --> 00:07:48,893
Oh.
179
00:07:49,418 --> 00:07:51,206
Hey, good afternoon, gentlemen.
180
00:07:51,291 --> 00:07:53,096
- Oh, oh, oh!
- Hey.
181
00:07:53,181 --> 00:07:54,932
Councilman.Hey.
182
00:07:55,080 --> 00:07:57,427
I just wanted to drop in
and say hi
183
00:07:57,512 --> 00:07:59,448
to some of my finest
constituents.
184
00:07:59,533 --> 00:08:00,759
And Trey.
185
00:08:02,002 --> 00:08:04,057
You always got jokes,
Councilman.
186
00:08:04,142 --> 00:08:06,384
Yeah, and you always got
a court date.
187
00:08:06,868 --> 00:08:07,839
You got him.
188
00:08:08,045 --> 00:08:09,550
Come on.
189
00:08:10,090 --> 00:08:12,095
Wow, so that's
Councilman Evans, huh?
190
00:08:12,179 --> 00:08:13,346
He's really charming.
191
00:08:13,431 --> 00:08:15,385
Yeah, and wait
till you feel his handshake.
192
00:08:15,574 --> 00:08:18,690
It's smoother than margarine
melting on a hot roll.
193
00:08:19,417 --> 00:08:20,867
Calvin Butler.
194
00:08:21,180 --> 00:08:23,417
Yeah.Hey. How's that
beautiful Tina?
195
00:08:23,524 --> 00:08:24,906
Well, she's married to me,
196
00:08:24,991 --> 00:08:26,234
so she's blessed.
197
00:08:26,715 --> 00:08:27,737
Yeah.
198
00:08:27,932 --> 00:08:30,253
Uh, Councilman.
I'm Dave Johnson.
199
00:08:30,338 --> 00:08:32,735
Dave Johnson. The competition.
200
00:08:33,865 --> 00:08:36,915
It is great
to finally meet you.
201
00:08:37,029 --> 00:08:38,753
It is good to meet you, too.
202
00:08:39,711 --> 00:08:41,714
Oh, my God, it's like a buttery hug.
203
00:08:43,060 --> 00:08:44,978
I've been doing
my homework on you,
204
00:08:45,195 --> 00:08:48,432
and it looks like you
are ready to run a good race.
205
00:08:48,870 --> 00:08:50,557
Probably in short shorts.
206
00:08:52,775 --> 00:08:56,096
Well, you know, Councilman,
now that you're here, uh,
207
00:08:56,213 --> 00:08:58,566
- I have a question for you.
- Go right ahead.
208
00:08:58,878 --> 00:09:00,565
Well, I'm just curious on how
209
00:09:00,650 --> 00:09:02,894
you plan on approaching the
shortage of school teachers
210
00:09:02,979 --> 00:09:04,979
that our district
is currently facing.
211
00:09:05,200 --> 00:09:06,422
- Hmm.
- Hmm.
212
00:09:07,147 --> 00:09:08,410
Mmm.
213
00:09:08,927 --> 00:09:10,817
Mm-hmm.
214
00:09:11,714 --> 00:09:13,068
Dave, that is
215
00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:15,389
a very important issue,
and I'm glad
216
00:09:15,474 --> 00:09:17,202
you brought that up.
217
00:09:17,694 --> 00:09:18,835
Our teacher shortage
218
00:09:18,927 --> 00:09:21,577
is a real challenge.
Yeah. Right on. - Yes, sir.
219
00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:24,460
It is a challenge
that we shall meet together
220
00:09:24,778 --> 00:09:27,124
as a community.
All right. All right.
221
00:09:27,209 --> 00:09:28,692
And speaking of meeting,
222
00:09:28,878 --> 00:09:31,428
did y'all hear my story about
how I met Eddie Murphy?
223
00:09:34,710 --> 00:09:35,888
Let Dave in here.
224
00:09:35,980 --> 00:09:37,855
He ain't heard
it yet. Come on.
225
00:09:37,940 --> 00:09:39,727
- I was getting my car washed.
- Okay.
226
00:09:39,812 --> 00:09:41,556
- He was getting his car washed.
- No!
227
00:09:41,647 --> 00:09:44,421
- I look over at him. He looks back at me.
- What?
228
00:09:44,506 --> 00:09:45,953
He said...
229
00:09:46,037 --> 00:09:47,650
For real!
230
00:09:47,851 --> 00:09:49,769
He... Just like in the movies!
231
00:09:49,892 --> 00:09:52,289
He laughs like in the movies!
232
00:09:52,788 --> 00:09:54,154
I can't believe it.
233
00:09:54,238 --> 00:09:56,982
Councilman Evans
totally dodged my question.
234
00:09:57,724 --> 00:09:58,975
But can you believe
235
00:09:59,060 --> 00:10:02,749
that him and Eddie Murphy
both use cinnamon air freshener?
236
00:10:03,077 --> 00:10:04,561
Wow.
237
00:10:05,158 --> 00:10:07,163
No. Not wow.
238
00:10:07,248 --> 00:10:10,530
If anything deserves a "wow,"
it's my five-point plan.
239
00:10:10,649 --> 00:10:12,393
Each point has five
points of its own.
240
00:10:12,604 --> 00:10:13,710
It's a 25-point plan.
241
00:10:13,795 --> 00:10:16,843
That's 25 wows.
242
00:10:16,928 --> 00:10:19,216
Look, Dave,
the bottom line is
243
00:10:19,301 --> 00:10:20,696
to half of the people,
244
00:10:20,781 --> 00:10:22,395
you're the white guy
who's new in town.
245
00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:25,276
To the other half,
you're the new guy who's white.
246
00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:28,073
Hey. Yo, Dave,
247
00:10:28,158 --> 00:10:30,250
you got some explaining
to do, man.
248
00:10:30,622 --> 00:10:31,932
What are you
talking about?
249
00:10:32,017 --> 00:10:33,800
Isaiah posted
a picture of you online,
250
00:10:33,885 --> 00:10:35,331
standing next
to a Confederate flag.
251
00:10:35,524 --> 00:10:37,698
- What?
- Well, that's crazy.
252
00:10:37,783 --> 00:10:38,863
I would never...
253
00:10:38,948 --> 00:10:40,393
Oh. Yeah, that's me.
254
00:10:45,008 --> 00:10:47,187
You better start explaining
why you're in a picture
255
00:10:47,272 --> 00:10:50,408
posing next to a cake
with a Confederate flag on it.
256
00:10:50,498 --> 00:10:52,151
Calvin, you don't understand.
257
00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:55,503
Look, that picture was
from my tenth birthday party.
258
00:10:55,630 --> 00:10:57,157
Well, what'd you do
when you turned 11,
259
00:10:57,242 --> 00:10:58,651
go to a Klan rally?
260
00:11:00,756 --> 00:11:02,794
Isaiah cropped the picture.
261
00:11:02,879 --> 00:11:05,101
Look, the theme of the party
was The Dukes of Hazzard.
262
00:11:05,186 --> 00:11:07,235
That flag is on their car.
263
00:11:07,320 --> 00:11:09,151
I had no idea what it meant.
264
00:11:09,291 --> 00:11:10,861
I'll tell you
what it means now.
265
00:11:10,946 --> 00:11:13,125
You can forget about
being on the city council.
266
00:11:13,210 --> 00:11:16,349
In fact, I wouldn't even get
on a city bus.
267
00:11:17,343 --> 00:11:18,521
This is a disaster.
268
00:11:18,606 --> 00:11:20,013
I'm gonna go talk to Gemma.
269
00:11:20,098 --> 00:11:22,427
Why didn't I have
an A-Teamparty?
270
00:11:22,512 --> 00:11:24,724
Everybody loves Mr. T.
271
00:11:26,591 --> 00:11:28,474
Aw, man, I can't
believe this.
272
00:11:28,559 --> 00:11:29,607
I called it.
273
00:11:29,692 --> 00:11:31,001
I knew this would happen.
274
00:11:31,544 --> 00:11:33,083
What? You knew
275
00:11:33,168 --> 00:11:35,695
Isaiah would find
a 25-year-old picture
276
00:11:35,780 --> 00:11:38,380
of Dave blowing out the
candleson a Confederate flag cake?
277
00:11:39,073 --> 00:11:41,467
Yeah. I just didn't say it
out loud.
278
00:11:42,718 --> 00:11:44,636
Well, we got to help
him clear his name.
279
00:11:44,899 --> 00:11:47,919
How?
His name is on the cake.
280
00:11:49,303 --> 00:11:50,911
Dad, Dave is your friend.
281
00:11:51,023 --> 00:11:52,288
You know he's not racist.
282
00:11:52,373 --> 00:11:53,607
I know that.
283
00:11:53,692 --> 00:11:55,185
But what am I supposed to do?
284
00:11:55,278 --> 00:11:58,740
Everyone who's seen that picture
already thinks he is.
285
00:11:58,825 --> 00:12:01,134
Which is exactly why we need
to help him.
286
00:12:01,427 --> 00:12:03,497
Because nobody knows better
than black people
287
00:12:03,582 --> 00:12:06,066
how painful it is to be labeledas
something that you're not.
288
00:12:06,825 --> 00:12:08,299
Right, Pop?
289
00:12:09,352 --> 00:12:11,088
Damn it, Malcolm.
290
00:12:12,196 --> 00:12:14,299
Now I got to do the right thing.
291
00:12:14,384 --> 00:12:15,820
And that's on you.
292
00:12:19,471 --> 00:12:21,776
I can't believe
Isaiah would do this.
293
00:12:21,923 --> 00:12:23,885
His handshake
isn't like a buttery hug.
294
00:12:23,970 --> 00:12:25,322
It's like a...
295
00:12:25,737 --> 00:12:28,002
Damn it!
It islike a buttery hug!
296
00:12:30,143 --> 00:12:31,846
Well, two can play
at this game.
297
00:12:31,931 --> 00:12:34,151
I'm gonna dig up
some dirt on Isaiah
298
00:12:34,236 --> 00:12:36,284
- and see how he likes it.
- What dirt?
299
00:12:36,629 --> 00:12:38,460
Like how he never
does anything
300
00:12:38,654 --> 00:12:40,260
or is cheating on his wife
301
00:12:40,345 --> 00:12:42,877
or how he embezzled millions
of dollars from the city.
302
00:12:43,246 --> 00:12:44,487
You found that online?
303
00:12:44,572 --> 00:12:46,264
No, I'm putting it there.
304
00:12:46,621 --> 00:12:47,712
Gemma,
305
00:12:47,797 --> 00:12:50,026
we are not gonna stoop
to his level.
306
00:12:50,387 --> 00:12:52,392
Look, we just have
to face facts.
307
00:12:52,477 --> 00:12:53,877
I'm done.
308
00:12:54,273 --> 00:12:55,843
Don't talk like that.
309
00:12:56,099 --> 00:12:59,252
You have never backed down
from a fight in your life.
310
00:12:59,498 --> 00:13:01,372
Not even when my stripper
cousins jumped you
311
00:13:01,456 --> 00:13:02,950
at Nana's birthday.
312
00:13:04,051 --> 00:13:05,348
Yeah, that was no joke.
313
00:13:05,433 --> 00:13:08,265
Bambi threw glitter
right in my eyes.
314
00:13:09,597 --> 00:13:10,698
Hey, Gemma.
315
00:13:10,783 --> 00:13:11,875
Hey, Dave.
316
00:13:12,034 --> 00:13:13,848
Are you here to say
"I told you so"?
317
00:13:14,012 --> 00:13:15,060
I wasn't.
318
00:13:15,145 --> 00:13:16,286
But now that
you mention it,
319
00:13:16,371 --> 00:13:17,965
it does feel right, doesn't it?
320
00:13:18,395 --> 00:13:20,114
Well, don't bother.
321
00:13:20,199 --> 00:13:22,118
I think it's pretty obvious thatl
have to drop out of the race.
322
00:13:22,202 --> 00:13:24,458
Oh, Calvin,
please talk some sense into him.
323
00:13:24,543 --> 00:13:25,896
I'll be upstairs.
324
00:13:25,981 --> 00:13:28,377
You're not gonna go post lies
about Isaiah, are you?
325
00:13:28,844 --> 00:13:30,786
Well, not anymore.
326
00:13:32,274 --> 00:13:33,379
So whatdo you want?
327
00:13:34,584 --> 00:13:35,629
Look,
328
00:13:35,714 --> 00:13:37,848
I know I told you
that you shouldn't run,
329
00:13:37,933 --> 00:13:40,852
but I don't want to see
you go down like this.
330
00:13:41,035 --> 00:13:43,622
If Isaiah's willing to
stoop this low, then,
331
00:13:43,707 --> 00:13:45,786
clearly, we need some
change around here.
332
00:13:45,995 --> 00:13:47,913
Which is why
you have my vote.
333
00:13:48,208 --> 00:13:50,213
Unless that line
is too long.
334
00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:51,590
Yeah.
335
00:13:51,702 --> 00:13:52,903
So you're gonna help me?
336
00:13:52,988 --> 00:13:54,123
Yes.
337
00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:55,778
But, first,
we need to find out
338
00:13:55,863 --> 00:13:57,911
if Isaiah has any
more dirt on you.
339
00:13:58,049 --> 00:13:59,358
Like, for Halloween,
340
00:13:59,443 --> 00:14:02,011
did you ever go as a
pointy-headed ghost?
341
00:14:07,339 --> 00:14:08,909
Hi, I'm calling
on behalf
342
00:14:08,994 --> 00:14:11,731
of the Dave Johnson for
City Council campaign...
343
00:14:12,057 --> 00:14:15,606
Oh, well, let me tell you
something about yomama...
344
00:14:16,187 --> 00:14:18,000
Hello?
345
00:14:18,242 --> 00:14:19,309
Okay.
346
00:14:19,394 --> 00:14:21,590
So far, that's
three "yo mamas..."
347
00:14:22,941 --> 00:14:24,417
...five "go to hells," -
348
00:14:24,502 --> 00:14:27,276
And one "I better not
seeyour ass at Chipotle."
349
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:31,504
Everyone is
so mad at us.
350
00:14:31,628 --> 00:14:33,546
I don't know how much more
of this I can take.
351
00:14:33,935 --> 00:14:36,637
And I'm really gonna miss
Chipotle.
352
00:14:37,317 --> 00:14:39,481
Look, I know this is bad
right now,
353
00:14:39,567 --> 00:14:40,962
but you can get
through this.
354
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:42,051
You're tough.
355
00:14:42,270 --> 00:14:44,101
I'm not so sure.
356
00:14:44,186 --> 00:14:46,028
Well, I am, okay?
357
00:14:46,113 --> 00:14:48,270
You moved your family
into this neighborhood,
358
00:14:48,355 --> 00:14:50,316
and you didn't take mess
from anybody.
359
00:14:50,401 --> 00:14:51,536
I guess.
360
00:14:51,621 --> 00:14:53,864
And you're a principal
at a private school.
361
00:14:53,950 --> 00:14:57,304
You have to deal with snotty,
spoiled brats all day.
362
00:14:57,452 --> 00:14:59,567
And their kids, too.
363
00:15:01,102 --> 00:15:03,369
Half the time, I can't even tell
if the moms are mad at me
364
00:15:03,453 --> 00:15:05,497
'cause of all the Botox.
365
00:15:06,818 --> 00:15:08,083
Trust me, girl.
366
00:15:08,168 --> 00:15:09,694
You got this.
367
00:15:09,820 --> 00:15:11,411
- Maybe you're right.
- Mm.
368
00:15:11,496 --> 00:15:13,958
I am kind of a badass B-word.
369
00:15:14,043 --> 00:15:15,830
Mm. Damn straight!
370
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:19,270
Mm! You are the second
strongest woman I know.
371
00:15:19,370 --> 00:15:20,505
Who's the first?
372
00:15:20,590 --> 00:15:21,919
Me, B-word!
373
00:15:25,227 --> 00:15:26,760
Okay, Dave,
374
00:15:27,112 --> 00:15:28,412
you sure you're ready for this?
375
00:15:28,496 --> 00:15:29,959
It's gonna get
kind of rough in there.
376
00:15:30,043 --> 00:15:32,020
No problem.
I'm just gonna start
377
00:15:32,105 --> 00:15:34,371
by telling them that
there's no way that I'm racist
378
00:15:34,456 --> 00:15:38,184
because my best
friend is black.
379
00:15:40,505 --> 00:15:42,590
As your black best friend,
380
00:15:42,838 --> 00:15:45,965
never say you have
a black best friend.
381
00:15:46,574 --> 00:15:49,145
Okay. All right. Well, then
I'm just gonna go in there
382
00:15:49,230 --> 00:15:51,757
and tell them that these
false accusations have got...
383
00:15:52,020 --> 00:15:54,176
Have got me
straight trippin'.
384
00:16:01,487 --> 00:16:03,144
I take it back.
385
00:16:03,501 --> 00:16:05,512
I'm not your black best friend.
386
00:16:06,774 --> 00:16:07,952
Okay, so...
387
00:16:08,037 --> 00:16:09,563
Well, what am I
supposed to do?
388
00:16:09,648 --> 00:16:12,654
Look, just go in there and
show them who you really are.
389
00:16:12,751 --> 00:16:13,973
I'll have your back.
390
00:16:15,176 --> 00:16:16,387
Okay. I'm just
gonna go in there
391
00:16:16,471 --> 00:16:20,497
and I'm gonna clap...
back... at my haters.
392
00:16:23,268 --> 00:16:25,966
I never should've shown him
Black Twitter.
393
00:16:28,792 --> 00:16:30,067
Hey, guys! Hey, guys.
394
00:16:32,495 --> 00:16:33,847
What are you doing here?
395
00:16:33,932 --> 00:16:36,198
Yeah. And if you gota casserole,
396
00:16:36,382 --> 00:16:39,428
you drop it off
and you leave.
397
00:16:42,765 --> 00:16:45,606
Okay, obviously, everyone
here has seen the picture.
398
00:16:45,691 --> 00:16:48,915
But I swear, you guys,
it is not what it looks like.
399
00:16:49,176 --> 00:16:50,247
Please.
400
00:16:50,339 --> 00:16:51,489
I've used that line before,
401
00:16:51,574 --> 00:16:52,950
and it was
always what it looked like.
402
00:16:54,384 --> 00:16:56,519
All right. Okay,
hold on, everybody.
403
00:16:56,604 --> 00:16:58,083
Come on.
Give the man a chance.
404
00:16:58,168 --> 00:16:59,302
A chance to what,
405
00:16:59,387 --> 00:17:01,262
say he's got
a black best friend?
406
00:17:03,776 --> 00:17:06,137
Thank God you talked
to me outside.
407
00:17:06,290 --> 00:17:08,077
Okay, listen up.
408
00:17:08,418 --> 00:17:11,555
Now, I know what everybody
in here is thinking about Dave.
409
00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:14,012
But I've known this man
for two years,
410
00:17:14,097 --> 00:17:16,015
and I can tell you this
for sure...
411
00:17:16,100 --> 00:17:17,844
There is not
a racist bone
412
00:17:17,929 --> 00:17:20,208
in his pasty littlewhite body.
413
00:17:22,033 --> 00:17:23,739
But what about the picture?
414
00:17:23,824 --> 00:17:27,419
Look, he was a dumb kid
who watched a dumb TV show.
415
00:17:27,504 --> 00:17:29,614
- That doesn't mean that he was...
- Wait, wait.
416
00:17:29,699 --> 00:17:31,200
Is that
from The Dukes of Hazzard?
417
00:17:31,285 --> 00:17:32,899
I used to love
that show!
418
00:17:34,969 --> 00:17:36,887
Yeah. It had
that cool theme song.
419
00:17:37,041 --> 00:17:39,656
♪ Just the good ol' boys...
420
00:17:40,013 --> 00:17:41,747
Oh, wait.
421
00:17:43,239 --> 00:17:44,270
See?
422
00:17:44,355 --> 00:17:45,664
You all watched that show.
423
00:17:45,749 --> 00:17:48,625
Which means that
Dave didn't do anything wrong.
424
00:17:48,813 --> 00:17:50,544
That's right.
This was just Isaiah trying
425
00:17:50,629 --> 00:17:52,460
to smear my name
so that he could
426
00:17:52,545 --> 00:17:55,004
win... the... election.
427
00:17:55,617 --> 00:17:58,754
I can't believe
Isaiah would stoop that low.
428
00:17:58,839 --> 00:17:59,886
Exactly.
429
00:17:59,971 --> 00:18:02,044
And you all saw him dodge
Dave's question.
430
00:18:02,129 --> 00:18:04,520
That's because
he doesn't have answers.
431
00:18:04,605 --> 00:18:05,653
But Dave does.
432
00:18:05,738 --> 00:18:08,526
He has a 25-point plan that,
trust me,
433
00:18:08,829 --> 00:18:10,396
you do not want to hear.
434
00:18:11,407 --> 00:18:13,338
But i-if you
want to read it,
435
00:18:13,423 --> 00:18:14,885
I have a pamphlet
right here
436
00:18:14,985 --> 00:18:16,378
that has all...
437
00:18:18,412 --> 00:18:20,244
Look, my point is
438
00:18:20,329 --> 00:18:23,940
is that Dave Johnson
is gonna fight for us.
439
00:18:24,145 --> 00:18:25,940
He's gonna make
our schools stronger
440
00:18:26,025 --> 00:18:27,166
and our parks safer,
441
00:18:27,251 --> 00:18:29,735
and he's gonna listento
the needs of this community.
442
00:18:29,823 --> 00:18:32,133
And that's why he has
Calvin Butler's support.
443
00:18:32,264 --> 00:18:34,965
Now, come on.
Can he count on yours?
444
00:18:39,315 --> 00:18:41,518
Hey, tha-thank you,
guys.
445
00:18:41,603 --> 00:18:42,999
And thanks, Calvin.
446
00:18:43,144 --> 00:18:45,062
I don't know how
I can ever repay you.
447
00:18:45,147 --> 00:18:46,463
Well, when you're elected,
448
00:18:46,548 --> 00:18:48,330
you can fix my parking tickets.
449
00:18:49,896 --> 00:18:51,944
I'm gonna pretend that
I didn't hear that.
450
00:18:52,363 --> 00:18:55,105
Should I pretend
to say it again?
451
00:18:56,167 --> 00:18:58,564
And, you know,
guys, uh,
452
00:18:58,649 --> 00:19:02,003
just so you know,
Isaiah Evans isn't the only one
453
00:19:02,088 --> 00:19:05,073
who has rubbed elbows
with a famous person.
454
00:19:05,158 --> 00:19:07,033
Oh, yeah?
Who'd you meet?
455
00:19:07,585 --> 00:19:09,851
Well, a little celebrity chef
named
456
00:19:09,943 --> 00:19:11,408
- Paula Deen.
- Uh-oh.
457
00:19:11,499 --> 00:19:13,690
Come on. We got to go.
We got to go.-
458
00:19:13,774 --> 00:19:17,047
Well, where do you think I got
the recipe for the casserole?
459
00:19:23,814 --> 00:19:25,384
So, you ready
for your lesson?
460
00:19:25,500 --> 00:19:28,071
Yep.
Time to make my handshake
461
00:19:28,156 --> 00:19:31,056
smoother... than... Isaiah's.
462
00:19:32,467 --> 00:19:36,064
You know you don't
actually clap in a clapback?
463
00:19:36,149 --> 00:19:37,675
Well, then, whathave I been doing?
464
00:19:37,867 --> 00:19:39,595
I have no idea.
465
00:19:40,693 --> 00:19:41,735
Look,
466
00:19:41,844 --> 00:19:45,068
now, remember, when it comes
to shaking a man's hand,
467
00:19:45,223 --> 00:19:47,869
you want to be confident
and comforting,
468
00:19:48,166 --> 00:19:50,084
like a warm sock,
469
00:19:50,169 --> 00:19:51,423
fresh from the dryer,
470
00:19:51,508 --> 00:19:53,557
slipping onto his foot.
471
00:19:53,642 --> 00:19:55,647
Check this out.
472
00:19:56,095 --> 00:19:56,947
Hi.
473
00:19:57,079 --> 00:19:58,866
Calvin Butler.
Nice to meet you.
474
00:19:59,746 --> 00:20:00,887
Wow.
475
00:20:00,981 --> 00:20:02,279
I actually believe
you meant that.
476
00:20:02,363 --> 00:20:03,911
Yeah.
477
00:20:09,666 --> 00:20:10,932
Councilman Evans.
478
00:20:11,017 --> 00:20:11,977
What are you doing here?
479
00:20:12,062 --> 00:20:13,598
I just came by to say
480
00:20:13,690 --> 00:20:15,143
good luck on the campaign.
481
00:20:15,682 --> 00:20:17,288
Oh, after that photo,
482
00:20:17,373 --> 00:20:19,204
I could've sworn
you were gonna drop out.
483
00:20:19,647 --> 00:20:21,184
Well, not a chance.
484
00:20:21,391 --> 00:20:23,645
It's gonna take a lot morethan
that to scare me away.
485
00:20:23,852 --> 00:20:25,841
Okay.
486
00:20:27,789 --> 00:20:29,481
May the best man win.
487
00:20:39,475 --> 00:20:40,809
Damn.
488
00:20:41,099 --> 00:20:43,259
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
489
00:20:43,343 --> 00:20:45,343
Sync and corrections by srjanapala